It begins in the Classroom
It is important for a teacher is to create an environment that is safe and welcoming for all children. As an Elementary School teacher, I believe in focusing on the individual needs of students and involve them in the process of learning. It is my belief that individual differences need to be recognized, respected and even celebrated within the classroom. Doing this teaches empathy, tolerance, patience, kindness, respect and most of all self esteem in children. Some children have an abundance of esteem while others virtually none. It is sad. I look at my job as a very important one. We have your children in our care for 6+ hours. They need to know that they are loved and they are being heard and they are being valued. It is up to us to give them that.
Far too often we get too caught up on what we HAVE to get done for report cards, deadlines , etc. I challenge that! We need to foster social skills, self esteem and encourage discussions in the classroom. We must praise and reinforce appropriate behaviours on a daily basis. Get all the students involved. Even if this means we have to take time out of our math class when the kids have come in from recess because there was an issue on the playground-so be it! It is much easier to teach and have children understand the lesson when they have nothing else on their minds.
Some ideas I've used in my classroom:
Far too often we get too caught up on what we HAVE to get done for report cards, deadlines , etc. I challenge that! We need to foster social skills, self esteem and encourage discussions in the classroom. We must praise and reinforce appropriate behaviours on a daily basis. Get all the students involved. Even if this means we have to take time out of our math class when the kids have come in from recess because there was an issue on the playground-so be it! It is much easier to teach and have children understand the lesson when they have nothing else on their minds.
Some ideas I've used in my classroom:
- Teach and model "I feel" messages. As in "when you ____, it makes me feel ____. Can you please stop." I use this on a daily basis in my class ~ even on them if someone is interrupting for example.
- Read thought provoking literature on a daily basis (poems, quotes, newspaper articles, children's books…). I typically begin my day with something to get them thinking. We all know what its like to start our day off on the wrong foot. Children are the same. We need to re-start their day for them. Give them the chance to have a successful day.
- Catch them being good-ALWAYS look for the positive! I know this can be difficult at times but it can be anything from picking up litter, helping someone with a word, eating all their lunch, lending a pencil to someone, completing their lessons, having a great smile , etc. It doesn't have to be something grand but something noticed. I believe that ALL children have something to give. Also allow the kids to recognize other classmates too! Depending on your school, these random acts of kindness can be school wide or just within your class. The best is when its school wide. Then you can have assemblies where students are recognized for their acts or have them announced on the P.A. system.
- Once a week try and have a scheduled class meeting where you sit in a circle, pass a talking stick, and have a "talk" about the week. This is the time when you can discuss issues in and out of school. You'll get all sorts of things come up some not as relevant as others but to them it matters. I know this sounds like it won't work…no one will say that so-and-so is picking on me (especially when they are in that classroom) but trust me it does work as long as you allow them to speak freely and they know you are there to support them. If they don't mention anything during the meeting, some come up to you afterward and tell you more because they know you care.
- Send home class newsletters at the end of each week. This helps parents know what is going on in their children's lives and gives parents an opening if they've lost communication with their child.
- When a couple students come in from recess with an issue, I have them begin to tell me what is going on. If I do not feel it's an issue that I HAVE to intervene with I have them pick a spot in the classroom so they can talk and resolve their problem. I stay within listening range so I am aware of the issue and only join the conversation when I feel its necessary. I believe in instant consequences and talking right away. It is more effective.
- Keep records! I have a binder that I keep day to day notes about issues and I use it during our meetings. This way I am tracking behaviours and I can see if there is a pattern of behaviour or if issues are getting worse. I even write down the small issues, especially if they come up often. That way I can talk to parents about what is happening on a day to day basis. I try to write it down right away but if I cannot get to my binder I will write their names on my daily plan or on the sticky notes in my pocket so at the end of the day or "free moment" I will put it into the records.
- When it comes to bulling determined by our definition of REPEATED, deliberate, disrespectful behaviour; we need to focus on both the victim and the bully. They need to know they are both being heard and follow through with your course of action. Families need to be involved too. Depending on the circumstance (severe violence is never tolerated) I typically have the two children sit with me and talk about what happened — giving each equal time and opportunity to speak without being interrupted by the other. For more serious incidents I do not have the bully and the victim sitting together to listen to each other to talk, instead I talk to them individually, this lessons the power of the bully and encourages the victim to talk more freely. In both scenarios we come up with a resolution together and follow through.
- Talking about social skills, bullying and building self esteem has to be a part of your everyday teaching. It frustrates me when schools focus just on an anti-bully day or week when it NEEDS to be everyday all year long. Children need to be shown how to treat one another. It's a skill that has to be modelled by teachers, parents and other role models in their lives.